Thread Question: How do you approach a co-worker regarding the following habits that are distracting to other co-workers? They are as follows: 1. Answering only by mm mm mm...okay okay okay....mm mm 2. After eating any type of food she is always making a smacking/sucking sound between her teeth which gets very loud at times 3. She eaves drops on private conversations then gives opinions on matters that don't pertain to her. Please help me to address this in a diplomatic way. Thank you
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Let that person know about office ethics. Can't hurt by letting him/her know how you feel about their behavior. You need to address this sonner than letter, before you run out of patience.
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Miss Marilyn on
8/5/2008 1:38:32 PM
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I would like to give a big "Thank You' to everyone who responding to my thread ?. I will keep everyone's responses within a hands reach. Again - Thank You.
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Antoinette Rincon on
5/29/2008 12:05:47 PM
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I agree with many other responses that regarding #1 and
#3. However, with regards to #2...I would suggest not saying anything.
I work in a firm in the tax department and we'd been having some conflict issues. The powers that be wanted us to attend a series of seminars about team-building and conflict resolution. During these meetings, we had a discussion regarding confrontation with someone with whom we have a conflict and this very problem came up. The trainers said that everyone has quirks that may annoy us, but it's not something we are responsible to fix for everyone.
I recently did not take this advice and told one of my associates that his constant nose blowing was really getting on my last nerve and couldn't he take that to the bathroom? He became very offended and put in a complaint with the partners of our firm. Apparently, I do things that annoy him too. Lesson learned...
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Anonymous on
5/23/2008 2:25:41 AM
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Honestly your best bet is to take it up with HR. They need to know that you are not happy with your working environemnt and they need to offer solutions. It's not your job to deal with this co-workers habits.
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Anonymous on
5/22/2008 8:50:47 AM
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Be direct. Sometime this is the only way to handle the problem.
Don't direct any questions until you ask if this is a good time to talk,
then ask for her full attention. Tell her that you would like her to listen
to you when you have taken the time to talk with her and that you
request more than a hmm,etc as a response. You deserve her attention.
Her eating habits are long time habits but they can change, with a
gentle nudge.
As far as eaves dropping, the best thing to do is excuse yourself (if
possible) to address your phone call.
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Anonymous on
5/22/2008 8:49:23 AM
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We are all professionals and therefore we should carry ourselves in that manner. In regards to #1, you might want to ask your co-worker to be more specific in her answers. With #2 that is something that you will have to overcome and do your best to ignore it as Annonymous stated. #3 is unacceptable and should be approached. No one should get involved in private conversations and especially give opinions. You may need to have your private conversations in a more secluded area.
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Ms. Mary on
5/21/2008 1:26:53 PM
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Just FYI, Cindy Grosso was our speaker at our 2004 annual conference in Charleston. She did a great job!
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AEAP on
5/21/2008 1:11:10 PM
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I am not sure what part of the country your company is located in, but there is a fabulous woman in Charleston, SC. who travels all over the country teaching basic protocol and etiquette. Her name is Cindy Grosso and she runs the "Charleston School of Protocol and Etiquette", which also has online classes for such things as basic manners. www.charlestonschoolofprotocol.com. If your company is willing to pay for a class, you might want to suggest that your co-worker take one to further her career as it sounds as though she is doing herself as much damage as she is troubling you and your co-workers.
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Anonymous on
5/21/2008 12:25:13 PM
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We cannot raise adults or change their behaviors, nor is it our responsibility. If someone were to be dangerous to themselves or others, then we have a duty to step in to offer or seek help. However, we do have control over our own attitudes and behaviors. To accept someone as they are is a decision we make. We choose to accept. We choose to ignore. We choose to be tolerant. I know it's hard sometimes, but we have to look at the person and give them what we'd want for our own child or loved one. Tolerance, respect, acceptance. Sounds sanctimonious, and it's certainly difficult, but with time you'll see that person change and become more acceptable.
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Anonymous on
5/21/2008 11:06:14 AM
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I'm with Kimberly - this person sounds so familiar. As a matter of fact I have somewhat the same problem. Only mine is more attitude. Kelly's suggestion is good. I have tried that approach with my person - more of a co-worker instead of a supervisor approach. She seemed to take my advice well, changed for a couple of days, then back to the same rut she was in before. I hope you get some good suggestions. I will be watching this thread closely.
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Debbie Potter on
5/21/2008 10:40:51 AM
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Why do I feel like I know this person??? Maybe you can give her tips to improve her soft skills.
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Kimberly Edge on
5/21/2008 9:51:47 AM
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