What do you do if your boss doesn't respect you? If you do everything that you can, if you have already sat down and had the discussion, if you do almost everything in the office Way above and beyond the general Admin duties... What do you do?
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Update on Respect.
I want to thank most of you for comments. I have went ahead and sat down with my boss to discuss my issues. Things did get better for awhile. I know that there is always something to learn from all of life's experiences. My work is very small, no HR or anything. I'm the only Admin in the office and have that do-it-all job. There are days that really get to me and I feel all alone. I've decided to take myself out of the pitty, straighten up, and move forward (where ever that may be).
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Anonymous on
1/13/2010 2:04:16 PM
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I want to thank you all for your suggestions and taking the time to answer. Fist I would like to clear up that I do respect myself and what I do; it has nothing to do with how many pat on the backs I get, but a simple respect for what I do, nothing more. I find it hard when people talk down to me and that is just want it was. I posted this because I was feeling very frustrated and wanted in some way to vent and see what others would do. I joined this association so that I would be able to talk with other Admins (I am the Only admin in our company), to connect and share our experiences, to be there for each other with encouragement. I am sorry to read that some of you are here for other reasons than that - I felt the cold through the computer and I am very sorry that You are that unhappy with your lives and feel that you should not post if you are wanting to be so negative. For everyone else I want you to know that I appreciate you support. Our office does not have an HR department, so I met one on one with my boss and confronted the problem. Deep down I really do enjoy my job, but as everything in life there is learning and growing. I look forward to learning and growing with all of you!
Sincerely,
Kay
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Anonymous on
6/5/2009 8:42:42 AM
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You look for another job, either within the company or externally. I've been there. All the best.
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Enid on
5/19/2009 3:29:58 PM
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You leave. You know what to do. FYI: Respect begins within you. If you feel you've done all you can to get respect and if you have spoken w/your boss and HR, then your resume should have been updated and distributed a long time ago.
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Anonymous on
5/19/2009 2:19:13 PM
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Quit.
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Anonymous on
5/19/2009 2:18:33 PM
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I don't know what types of conflicts you and your boss are having, but sometimes there are two very strong personalities that working together amicably is not possible. For a successful working relationship it takes great skills and a good personality fit. Has your relationship deteriorated to the point that it cannot be repaired? What are some of the issues where you experience conflict? Identifying those issues is step one. Then you must evaluate how you can change your approach to those issues. Your boss is the boss and is the person in control. The executive secretary is a most important and valuable support person to the boss, but it is important to remember that we support our bosses and not try to be in charge.
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Anonymous on
5/19/2009 2:17:46 PM
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Hello,
The way I see it you have 2 choices:
1. Accept it knowing you are doing the best you can and it is not YOU.
2. Find another job
Good luck. I had it the other way around. The boss respected me but some of the main co-workers did not. I hung in there and together with my boss we were able to turn things around and today is much better!
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Anonymous on
5/19/2009 2:16:51 PM
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Find a new job.
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Anonymous on
5/19/2009 2:16:10 PM
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It could be bad chemistry. You describe yourself as the perfect worker...all that should matter in the work place is our work and getting it done...personality is secondary. Your manager's disrespect bothers you enough to post an online message, so it is very serious and cannot be ignored for much longer. Is it safe to assume that the boss mistreats you as well? Not liking you is one issue: he may not say hello in the morning, he will 'forget' to invite you to happy hour on Friday afternoons, but if he is cold, mean, and disrespectful...intolerable!
I say you can try and transfer to another department or if your company is small and your boss is everyone's boss, you would be smart to look for a new job. His disrespect will turn into an obvious burning displeasure and he may make you uncomfortable so you will quit. Never be forced out of a job. A good admin is never down for long. I live in the metro Miami Ft Lauderdale area and A.A. jobs are plentiful. Know your worth and don't take the disrespect. You have put in your time so you will get a good reference if and when you choose to leave. Good luck, Kay! Keep us posted!
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STEADMOND SMITH on
5/19/2009 12:56:20 PM
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ANSWER: Show people how to respect you by example - respect yourself. Once you are able to truly master Self-Respect, you more than likely will discover you no longer seek it from others.
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CANDICE ALVARADO on
5/19/2009 12:08:53 PM
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Kay- You have two choices- continue to live with the disrespect while still know that you do an awesome job, and chalk it up to a difference in opinion (and keep talking to your boss about it) or you can find another position that will make you happier. In these tough economic times, I know that that choice is a scary one and one that needs a lot of thought behind it. Do others feel the disrespect he gives you? Have you gone to HR about the problem? Make sure to write down every time that you feel disrespected. Having a diary of the offense is a powerful tool - instead of his word against yours and vague scenarios offered after the fact. Good luck! Please know that some people will always see others as less than perfect, no matter what they do. It's not about you then, it's about their own insecurities. Knowing that is half the battle and maybe you being confident in what you do and making sure he knows you feel confident in your work will jog him into being less harsh with you.
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DeDe on
5/19/2009 11:31:12 AM
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I believe that respect is a very subjective term (some feel compensation is sufficient, others prefer titles and benefits), but for the most part everyone should at least TRY to work in an environment where their work is valued and their presence and teamwork are appreciated. If you feel that your boss isn't honoring your contributions, either verbally, financially or otherwise, you have TWO options (if you really have attempted to discuss the matter and had no results): 1) Seek employment elsewhere, another department/company/profession, or 2) Live with it, accept it, and make the most of your time there.
It can be very difficult accepting that sort of rejection (which it is), but the sooner you accept it and do the best you can by your standards, and as long as those standards are up to the Boss's, you really need to 'Accept the things that you cannot change'
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Robert Spencer on
5/19/2009 11:18:28 AM
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Kay
In glancing through the list of inquires in the Forum, I came upon your inquiry which was not replied to. The word "respect" jumped out at me, hence this response. Respect is an extremely important subject. If you want to email me so that you can go into a little more detail, please email me directly at bauer@ci.delray-beach.fl.us. I've worked in a variety of companies and many of my bosses had different personalities over an extended period of time. Perhaps I can help in some way.
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Anonymous on
5/18/2009 1:12:10 PM
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